the red nine

And a Tiny Prints DEAL!

2011-11-26T08:11:00.001-08:00

Holy Cow!You know that LOVE a good deal! Tiny Prints notified me about an exclusive deal that isn't even posted on their website... GASP!Buy a $25 gift certificate and spend $100 on your holiday cards, and get $30 off your holiday cards order!Seriously, take advantage of this great offer!Who doesn't love free money?!Get going! Christmas is only a month away!

Tiny Prints is the place to go!

2011-11-26T07:00:00.000-08:00

It may come as no surprise that I love creativity, individuality, and spunk... I think that this is evident in multiple facets of my life. (my photography, my house, my clothes... my kids!)

That being said, I love businesses that are always on the edge of new and exciting ideas in their field. Tiny Prints has some awesome innovations in the Christmas Card arena this year! I love Christmas Cards! I love sending them. I love getting them! And I love it when they include a photo! I can never throw them away...

Tiny Prints has some awesomely fantastical cards this year!

I love this Sheer Collage Tri Fold card! You can place all the great photos that you have in one card! No need to just pick one! You can tell a little story in photos! It is great!

I also love to keep Christmas Cards! Imagine how cool it would be to keep your card every year and watch your family grow! It would be so easy to do with the Colorful Wreath Ornament Card They have lots of designs to choose from!

And if you are a little more traditional... I love the Bright Patterns line in Goldenrod card. I do love golden yellows at Christmas though. Red and green can be a little overrated sometimes.

I can say from personal experience that Tiny Prints is top of the line in quality and customer service. Their ink color is vibrant and their cardstock is equisite. It may be biased, but I think that my photos always look superb. ;)

Now, you may be curious about how I display all of these Tiny Prints Christmas Cards!
I have a couple of fun ideas...

Now, go get busy and order some lovely Christmas cards... and don't forget to send one to me. :)

Kindergarten

2011-08-15T19:27:00.000-07:00

First of all, that is a weird word...

Anyway, Oliver starts kindergarten tomorrow. And I am literally crying right now.... have been crying off and on for 2 days. I am pathetic. So, I decided to whip up a Top 10 list...

Top 10 Things NOT to do when your kid is going to kindergarten!

1. Do NOT go in and lay in bed with them just to watch them sleep. Do Not rub their hair softly. Do NOT talk to them about how much you are going to miss them everyday even though they can't hear you speaking. Do NOT start sobbing and snotting everywhere and wipe you nose on their pillow.

2. Do NOT spend hours gazing and fawning over old scrapbooks and photo albums of them when they were babies. Do NOT explain to them what you thought the first time you laid eyes on them. Do NOT relive the day they were born and try to figure out how they are old enough to go to school all day.

3. Do NOT try to trick yourself into thinking that summer will last forever. Do NOT think that if you ignore the fact that school is around the corner, it won't actually rear it's ugly little head. Because it happens, quick.

4. Do NOT take them shoe shopping only to realize that you have been shamming their little feet into shoes that are not 1, but 2 sizes too small! Then, do NOT be completely mystified by the fact that your children have indeed managed to GROW. Do NOT immediately feel saddened by the fact that you missed out on getting them new shoes for an entire shoe size!

5. Do NOT continue your ride on the guilty mom express by agonizing over the lost opportunities to make memories, play games, and tickle that you squandered while cooking, folding laundry, or coughfacebook,pinterest,bloggercough doing other frivolous activities.

6. Do NOT think about the fact that you are going to miss all of those funny phrases that they say so randomly. Like out of nowhere in the van today Oliver tells me that an elephant should go to the city pool and drink it all up if he is thirsty. Or hearing them sing the wrong words to lyrics in a song. Or getting kisses for nothing. Or hiding in the house just to scare the crap out of them when I am bored. Or dancing in the living room. Or singing him to sleep at naptime... ugh, I am bawling. again.

7. Do NOT remember your first day of kindergarten. Do NOT remember the nervous anxiety that swallowed me whole when I realized that my mom was leaving. Do NOT remember that despite how nice Mrs. Hiatt was, I still felt so alone... and scared. Do NOT remember how minutes lasted for hours. Do NOT remember feeling so insignificant.

8. Do NOT go through their closet and pull out all of the old clothes that are too small and then be crushed by the fact that this will only happen again and again. Growing and growing. Baby. Toddler. Preschooler. Elementary... Do NOT wish that you could just freeze time right here, right now.

9. Do NOT go into their room to tuck them in goodnight. Do NOT let the following happen to you... I walk into the boys' room and sit down on Oliver's bed. I lean down and give him a kiss. "I love you buddy." "I love you too Momma." Then he gently picks up a few strands of my hair as I am leaning over his face; my hair spread around us like a little curtain. He begins to twirl my hair as he usually does. He looks up at me, with a slight smile, but still a little worry in his eyes. "Momma, are ya gunna miss me?" Tears instantly flood my eyes. I can't let him see me upset. I fight them. "yeah" I reply in small whisper. He knows that I am sad. "Me too Momma... me too." I give him a big hug. Tickle him. And bolt for the door.

10. Do NOT blink. This is the only first day of kindergarten that they are going to get. This is the first day of a new era. Make it big! Make it fun! Make it theirs! To hold onto and remember 24 years later when their kids are going to school... Do NOT blink, it will be here before we know it.

Best of luck to all the mommas out there. Drink a cup of coffee and try to really be happy. We are blessed. God is good.

Stationery card

2011-06-24T06:33:00.001-07:00

Playful Prints Navy Birthday Invitation

Say "happy birthday," with a Shutterfly custom card design.

View the entire collection of cards.

Put the baby to bed.

2011-02-28T16:47:00.001-08:00

I have this habit of buying junk at yard sales. Like junk. Stuff that looks like it should be in a dumpster. Justin usually gives me the look. But alas, I pay my .25 and move on. Shamming it into the van. I always have the best of intentions. Sometimes, it just takes me a little while to see the plan through.

But I did it. I bought each of these for a quarter. The little "kitchen" or basic stand was a nasty burgundy color. A little paint, velcro, and fabric and Viola! The cradle was a dirty dirty dirty supposed to white about 5 years ago. Spraypaint, little mattress, quilt, and pillow and now Eliza can put the baby to bed. .50 isn't too bad... I used stuff from my stash for all the rest.

Yet another dress for loulou.

2011-02-28T16:32:00.000-08:00

I really liked this dress from Old Navy. But, I don't want to spend money. And it is only available in the big girl sizes. And it is long sleeved. So, I thought about it and decided to try to make something similar. I usually don't sew with jersey knit. It wasn't that bad really. I wanted it to be more empire waist than it turned out. But, it will do the trick. I am really on a red, white, blue, and yellow kick. I might add a fabric flower to this one. Not sure yet. I have another dress that I made... hmmm, let me see if I took any photos of it.

Well, you are in luck! I did take some photos. I just lopped off the top of a t-shirt and attached the skirt to it. The skirt was just a basic gathered tiered skirt. Nothing fancy. But I love it!

Come on Summer...

2011-02-27T19:06:00.000-08:00

Good gracious I wish warm weather would makes it way here. I enjoy winter... for the first few weeks. Then, I am ready for my 70 degree weather again. So, I thought I would do a little sweet summertime sewing, to hopefully induce Spring. I made 2 of these outfits. One for Eliza and one for a new baby named Eden. (I love that name!) I also made matching bloomers. The other photos are the rest of the baby shower gift that I made. I have really enjoyed getting back to my sewing. I think I am going to make a giant to-do list. Because I am a list maker. But, I only make lists because I love to cross things off of them.

Other things, I was talking with Oliver and Liam tonight at bedtime. It started to storm and thunder and they were frightened. So, I went into their room. We talked about rain, lightning, and thunder. Oliver looked at me and said, "God just talks and raises his hands and makes tornadoes and storms, right momma?" I was blown away. "Yes, Oliver that is right. How did you know that?" "I just knowed, Momma." Then we were talking about how God is perfect and the great creator. And we are sinners. We discussed what sin is. We talked about the things that we do that are wrong. We talked about how that sin keeps us from being able to be with God, because He is perfect. We talked about how Jesus died on the cross to pay for our sins. And that if we believe that Jesus is the son of God, and He died on the cross for our sins, and we say we are sorry and ask God to forgive us for our sins, then we can go to Heaven someday. We talked about how much Jesus loves us. And how mean the people were to Jesus. We talked about how we get to Heaven and where Heaven is. Oliver asked if God colored outside the lines. Liam asked if God made skateboards. We talked about how we will all be together with God someday in Heaven. And Oliver said, "Momma, Jesus will scoop us up in his arms out of the stream. But there's no alligators or crocodiles in the water. And he will carry us up to Heaven." I don't know what stream he is talking about. But I love the image... of my Saviour scooping me up. Cradling my children. Taking us out of this world. I see myself resting my head on his chest. Feet dangling. And He protects me. I want my Jesus to carry me everyday. And I am so thankful for my little boy giving me a gentle reminder of the joy that exists in the arms of Christ. God teaches me so much just through the act of being a mother.

I'm ticked.

2011-02-09T11:23:00.000-08:00

"I've got two daughters. 9 years old and 6 years old. I am going to teach them first of all about values and morals. But if they make a mistake, I don't want them punished with a baby."
Barack Obama

Check out this link:
Lisa Harris

“There was a leg and foot in my forceps, and a ‘thump, thump’ in my abdomen. Instantly, tears were streaming from my eyes.” So writes abortionist Lisa Harris in a disturbing article relating her experiences as an abortionist, particularly her anguished and “brutally visceral” experience of dismembering an 18 week gestation unborn child, while 18 weeks pregnant herself.

This makes me cry.
Because I am angry.
Because I am sad.
Because I cannot and refuse to sit back and let this continue to go on.

If you think you can handle it, check out this website,
abortion

The information here brought me to tears. And don't ignore it because it is uncomfortable. This is real life people. And it is time to buck up and take a look at what we are doing!

I am sickened by the selfishness of modern women. And the audacity of the excuses that we call men that stand by encourage such behavior. Our nation, this world, is a pathetic excuse. And I know that God will judge our actions. And there is mighty army of murdered unborn babies that will want to hear our "reasons" our "rights"... What about their "rights"?

Luke 17:1-2

Then said he unto the disciples, It is impossible but that offences will come: but woe unto him, through whom they come! It were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and he cast into the sea, than that he should offend one of these little ones

We need more people like this young girl.

And for all we know, we could have had thousands more, and they could have just been aborted. These babies have a story. They have skills, talents, and a purpose. And we are ripping (literally) all of their potential away from them.

Don't read this if you are easily offended by discussion of undergarments. Consider yourself forewarned.

2010-12-05T14:27:00.000-08:00

I wrote this post about a week ago. I have debated on whether or not to post it. I don't know who reads this blog... but then I was thinking, "...this is my blog. And this is me, being me. If someone is offended by what they read, how about don't come back. That easy." So, if you are offended, I didn't mean to. Many apologies. Now, go read someone elses blog. Have a nice life.

Yep. After my last post about the true meaning of Christmas, here I am. Making a Christmas list. But it is a really really short list.

All I want for Christmas...

is some new Bras and Panties!

That's right. I said it. It is open to the public now. Anyone could read it.
And I don't care.

Ladies, you know where I am coming from. Seriously, I haven't gotten a new bra since Liam was an infant. (coughLiam is 3cough) Wait! I take that back. I did get 2 new nursing bras when Eliza was born. And I am still sporting one of those puppies on a weekly basis.

You know it is bad when your bras are about 12 sizes too big. When you could probably fit an entire pair of balled up socks in there with your tatas. When your bra "deflates" if you get bumped into. Uh-huh. This is the world I am living in.

Don't get me wrong. I am not upset with the entire situation. I am happily back down to 125 lbs. I am not going to be that size and maintain the 34D bra size I was wearing post baby. I am just saying that something has got to give.

One of my 2 bras (yes 2) is currently being held together with a safety pin. The other one I rigged up to try to make it smaller. I would hardly call either of these efforts a success.

And my undies... oh, my undies. I hearby vow to never purchase underwear that comes in any kind of "multi-pack" again. No more 6-pack panties for this girl. And if the waistband has a "wander-er"... you know that stray piece of elastic that somehow miraculously escaped the waistband, and every time you try to break it off it whips you in the hip!-I am tossing them in the garbage!

I remember the days when I had multitudes of bras and panties. Pretty ones. Not these worn out "mom" bras and "granny" panties... Do you remember ladies, the days when you actually cared about what your undergarments looked like?! And that they would match! I am determined not to lose that part of myself in the "mommy-mix". I am sure that my husband wouldn't mind.

So, who is with me?! Or am I all alone in this world of embarrassing underwear confessions? If we don't do something soon, we will all be wearing Riders "Mom" jeans that come up to our ribs and feathering our bangs while wearing cardigans with embroidered kittens on them. Not a pretty site.

Update: I went shopping with my best friend Bri for her 29th birthday. We shopped. We laughed. We jumped on the trampoline at the mall. It was a great time. She went into the dressing room with me at Victoria's Secret. I was trying on stuff and trying to figure out what size I am... blah blah blah. Then it happened. She saw my old bra, and busted out into hysterical laughter. She literally thought it was trash. We decided that a homeless person would rather go bra-less than be caught in that contraption. All this to say, that it wasn't in my head. The bra actually was THAT bad.

Kids Card

2010-12-02T06:07:00.001-08:00

Lovely Branches Green 5x7 folded card

Unique party invitations and announcements by Shutterfly.

View the entire collection of cards.

YO YO YO... Wait I mean HO HO HO! Shutterfly Christmas Card Shout-Out!

2010-12-01T20:16:00.000-08:00

So... Do you have an amazing photograph to show off to friends and family? How about multiple photographs? Want to showcase your new engagement? Or those lovely little rascals that you adore? How about a photo of just yourself making a goofy face! Live it up people!

Show it off with Shutterfly! As a photographer, I have printed from Shutterfly many many times! Their quality, shipping times, and customer service are top notch! Not to mention the vast array of choices you have when designing your card. Not to great with computers? No problems! Shutterfly's website is easy to maneuver and their design templates are a piece of cake! (mmm cake... focus!)

I am planning on taking our family photo and sending it out to our loved ones this Christmas season. It is perfect, because then they won't throw away the card! No wasted money! I am a penny pincher.

I plan on using this layout for our Christmas card! I love the color combination and the old fashioned feel of it! It has a scrapbooky-ness that I love. (Is scrapbooky-ness a word? I digress...)

Shutterfly Christmas Cards

Or you could go with a more sophisticated and classic appeal. Something like this!

But why stop with just a photo card?! Shutterfly has loads of options. I know I would love to have a customized coffee mug like this one! With Chocolate! Hello!!!

Shutterfly Photo Mug

Or need an awesome gift for Mom and Dad? Grandma and Grandpa? Knock out 2 birds with 1 stone! Whip up a couple of amazing calendars. It is the gift that gives all year long! These are durable and the print quality is fantastic. I made a large poster calendar shortly after Eliza was born with a photo of all of the kids on it. I hung it in my greasy kitchen of all places, and it was perfect! It truly is a gift that they will treasure.

Shutterfly Calendars

I assure you that you will not be disappointed! As an added bonus!!! How about some FREE SHIPPING! Boo-Yah! Simply just enter the code SHIP25 at checkout on your order of $25 or more and it ships for free. Sounds delightful doesn't it! And while you are there at Shutterfly creating your wonderful gifts and cards for your loved ones, don't forget to order all of your photos that you have been procrastinating printing off. I have a crap ton to print. Guilty as charged. But think of it, you order your cards, mugs, calendars, prints all at the same time and get that FREE SHIPPING! And save yourself some cash-ola. That is how we do it.

So, hurry up. Click on one of those little links above and get crackin'! Christmas is only 24 days away folks. We are running on a tight schedule here.

Power.

2010-12-01T10:28:00.000-08:00

Christmas Eve Sarajevo - Trans-Siberian Orchestra @ Yahoo! Video

Christmas music is usually light.
Christmas music is usually happy.
Christmas music is usually jolly.

This Christmas song is powerful.
This Christmas song is heavy.
This Christmas song gives me goosebumps.

Christmas is a jolly time.
But it is a serious time as well.
It is when our Saviour was born, only to die for sins.

When you think of the weight of that moment.
The moment that Christ took His first breath in a manger.
The moment the world changed.

It is powerful.
All of this time, God knowingly gave us His son.
Because of His love for us.

Mary, exhausted, gazing at her newborn son.
Fearful for the life that lay before Him.
Surrendered to be a servant to her God, no matter the cost.

This Christmas I want to remember what the true meaning of this holiday season is.

In a blink.

2010-11-27T19:38:00.000-08:00

Ewiza Jane.
wittleone.
hungry bird.

You started growl-huffing this week, and it cracks me up.
You speak fluent "baa" and "uh-oh".
Blowing raspberries and smacking your lips.

Brothers are hugs and clapping.
Smash-face time is my favorite.
(When we squish our faces together and you try to bite my nose.)

You climb stairs with ease.
You crawl on one knee.
Cruising around the room holding onto furniture.

Bananas, yogurt drops, and cheerios are in the top 3.
You like just about all foods.
When you don't want something, you shake your head no. (this kills me!)

I still smell your hair.
I still pat your bottom.
I still rub your cheeks as you fall asleep.

You know the meaning of "no".
You cry generally every time you hear the word "no".
You have this face where you make the most heart breaking frown...

I wonder what you will be like a year from now.
I can't believe a year has gone by already.
I want you to forever be momma's little birdie bird.

I love to watch you and Daddy play together.
I know that you have a very special place in his heart.
I can't wait to watch you grow into the woman that God wants you to be.

Eliza Jane, you are beautiful in so many ways.
You have a wonderful story to tell.
I am so blessed to be your momma.

I love you.
I love you.
I love you.

Happy Halloween... late.

2010-11-02T11:24:00.001-07:00

Wow... things have been crazy in our home! I have been blessed to be quite busy with my photography. Which is great. But... I miss just being "momma". So, going out Trick-or-Treating with the kids was a sweet treat. (get it...)

A little background on Halloween in our home. Liam is terrified of it. Period. He seriously freaks out. We have zero decorations. Except a pumpkin that I painted to look like Thomas and one like Olivia. I have had friends that have had to take down their decorations because he wouldn't stop crying. And these decorations weren't even scary. But, we decided to try and go trick-or-treating again anyway. We parked the van downtown Attica, and started to unload everyone. We were walking toward the businesses that were passing out candy when Justin and I heard Liam whispering to himself... "I can do dis. I can do dis. I can do dis." We immediately looked at each other, trying to hold back our laughter. It was just too sweet. He had a grip on Justin's hand and wouldn't let go. Needless to say, he only made it for about 5 minutes. Then he said, "I wanna outta here. I'm ready to be done." So Justin took him to the van while Oliver, Eliza, and I finished for about 15 minutes or so. We went to my mom's house for some chili and my nephew Andrew was there. Liam wanted to go trick-or-treating with Andrew. He did great!!! He went for over an hour. No problems! We were so proud of him and kept cheering him on. It is such a great feeling to witness our child overcome a fear. I was thinking that this must be a very small comparison to what God feels when we trust Him and take a step of faith and conquer a fear, trial, or situation.
I know I have totally sucked at keeping up on blogging. And I don't predict it will get better anytime soon. I am swamped over here. :) But this winter I plan to do a lot more.

Whooo are Yooouuu?

2010-09-15T13:50:00.000-07:00

Infant Owl Costume from Pottery Barn Kids
I love this costume. But not the $50 price tag. So, I attempted to make my own for Eliza. There were some adjustments made... and it is far from perfect. But I think it will be lovely for Halloween. And it only cost me about $7.00 to make it and the matching dress underneath.

I basically made a very amateur hooded cape. Very amateur. (lots of seam ripping took place in the making of this costume.) The ears and the beak look red in the photos.. but they are actually a fushia pink. I also made a very basic dress with ruffled reathers on the front. By using the fleece, I didn't have to fuss with hems or armholes. That was nice. And the fleece will be nice and warm for Halloween night! Brilliant, I know. My biggest bummer... they didn't have tan fleece. So I had to use cream. So, she is a little white owl. Still adorable. I have 2 more costumes to make before Halloween... Liam = bat. Oliver = dragon. I also have about umpteen million photos still to be edited... And here I am blogging. Ugh.

Farewell world.

Not Me Monday!

2010-08-23T11:15:00.000-07:00

It's that time again...
Not Me Monday!

Motherhood is loaded with judgment and criticism. And I must say that I am the epitome of a glorious shining example of mother of the year...

I most certainly did not help my 3 year old put on his underwear, see the skid marks in them, and continue to put them on him anyway. I would never do such a disgusting thing.

I would never feed my children cold hotdogs for lunch, 3 days in a row. All because I am not hungry enough to actually cook something. Never.

What kind of mother would force her child to try a bite of a bell pepper from the garden only to see moments afterward that there was a worm in the pepper... and then gag... not this mom.

Mother of the year would not wake up in the morning with one boob freezing due to its exposure to the chilly air because she was too lazy/tired/exhausted to simply put her bra back on after an early morning feeding for her daughter.

Loving, tender, and sweet mothers would never completely flip their lids and begin yelling at her 2 young boys that if they don't pick up the million train tracks and thomas the tank engines, then she would smash them with a hammer and throw them in the garbage... all of this occuring while her 9 month old daughter is puking all over her and the living room floor. After the chaotic moment, her oldest (4 year old) son would look up at her hold out his little hands and say, "Momma, We're gunnaneed you da calm down wif us." A good mother would never lose her cool to the point that the 4 year old is the logical thinker in that scenario. However a good mother would ask for forgiveness. :)

Being the fantastic mother that I am, I would never just turn on Max and Ruby so that I could write a blog post and hope for the best for the 3 kiddos in the other room.

Are you a proud or a broken person?

2010-08-02T05:45:00.000-07:00

Proud People

Focus on the failures of others
Self-righteous; have a critical, fault-finding spirit; look at own
life/faults through a telescope but others with a microscope
Look down on others
Independent/self-sufficient spirit
Maintain control; must be my way
Have to prove that they are right
Claim rights
Demanding spirit
Self-protective of time, rights, reputation
Desire to be served
Desire to be a success
Desire for self-advancement
Driven to be recognized/appreciated
Wounded when others are promoted and they are overlooked
“The ministry is privileged to have me!”
Think of what they can do for God
Feel confident in how much they know
Self-conscious
Keep people at arms’ length
Quick to blame others
Unapproachable
Defensive when criticized
Concerned with being “respectable”
Concerned about what others think
Work to maintain image/protect reputation
Find it difficult to share their spiritual needs with others
Want to be sure nobody finds out about their sin
Have a hard time saying, “I was wrong; will you please
forgive me?”
When confessing sin, deal in generalities
Concerned about the consequences of their sins
Remorseful over their sin—got caught/found out
When there is a misunderstanding or conflict, wait for others to
come and ask forgiveness
Compare themselves with others and feel deserving of honor
Blind to their true heart condition
Don’t think they have anything to repent of
Don’t think they need revival (Think everybody else does!)

Broken People
Overwhelmed with sense of their own spiritual need
Compassionate; forgiving; look for best in others
Esteem all others better than self
Dependent spirit/recognize need for others
Surrender control
Willing to yield the right to be right!
Yield rights
Giving spirit
Self-denying
Motivated to serve others
Desire to be faithful to make others a success
Desire to promote others
Sense of unworthiness; thrilled to be used at all;
eager for others to get credit
Rejoice when others are lifted up
“I don’t deserve to serve in this ministry!”
Know that they have nothing to offer God
Humbled by how much they have to learn
Not concerned with self at all
Risk getting close to others/willing to take the risks of
loving intimately
Accept personal responsibility—can see where they were wrong
“Easy to be entreated”
Receive criticism with a humble, open heart
Concerned with being real
All that matters is what God knows
Die to own reputation
Willing to be open/transparent with others
Willing to be exposed (Once broken, you don’t care who
knows—nothing to lose!)
Are quick to admit failure and to seek forgiveness
Deal in specifics
Grieved over the cause/root of their sins
Repentant over sin (forsake it)
Take the initiative to be reconciled; see if they can get to the
cross first!
Compare themselves to the holiness of God and feel desperate
need for mercy
Walk in the light
Continual heart attitude of repentance
Continually sense their need for a fresh encounter with the filling
of His Spirit!

Proud. Really displays an insecurity. A need to make up for something that we feel we are lacking. We feel a need to prove ourselves competent and successful.

Broken. Actually shows that we are aware of our need for our God's hand in our lives. We happily depend on His guidance and long for His will.

Liam is turning 3!

2010-07-18T10:06:00.000-07:00

Liam. Moo-zer. Miam.
My baby boy.
Who sucks his bottom lip while tickling Momma's belly.
Who loves Thomas, Buzz Lightyear, and Spiderman.
Who has at least 2 band-aids on his little body at all times.
Who eats "coo-cumbers" with "dips".
Who doesn't like ice cream.
Who dances and knows the words to most Regina Spektor songs.
Who draws fantastic illustrations of trains and monkeys.
Who wakes up at least once a week from a bad dream.
Who isn't afraid of beetles.
Who wrestles the dog.
Who doesn't like bathtime.
Who is "kinda fweezin'".
Who loves to be sang to.
My baby boy.
Who makes me happier everyday.
Happy Birthday.

The Wilderman 5

2010-07-14T06:03:00.000-07:00

This is the family that God has built.

God is good.

2010-07-13T10:18:00.000-07:00

This life is a blessing.

Eliza Jane

2010-07-11T10:13:00.000-07:00

She...
*rolls
*babbles
*plays patty cake
*weighs over 20 lbs
*is more than 28 inches long
*feeds herself fruit puffs
*moves around in her walker
*laughs so much she gets the hiccups
*loves all orange babyfoods
*is quite ticklish on her neck and thighs
*loves her brothers the best
*is growing growing growing
*is my sweet sweet "baby why-za", my "punkopoodledoodle", my "wittle one"

God is generous...

2010-07-10T14:38:00.001-07:00

We have such a wonderful neighborhood.
Filled with lovely families.
Growing families.
Loads of children.
And our awesome neighbor behind us.
Mr. Hayden has an extensive garden.
I used to only know him as the "tomato man", because he would leave bags of tomatoes on our porch.
Mr. Hayden has blessed our family beyond measure.
And today he blessed us with this magnificent bounce house!
He just gave it to us!
I love it when God uses people to bless others.
And it is just in time to use it at Liam's 3rd birthday party next weekend.

I am unbelievably amazed at the way that God not only provides for our family, but the ways in which he is generous beyond reason. God loves to see us happy. The same way I love to see my boys happy in that bounce house.

I am a grateful woman.

Mary Mary Quite Contrary...

2010-07-09T09:50:00.000-07:00

...how does your garden grow?

Justin had gotten some free plants from the horticulture department at the community college where he works. So we thought we would give it a go. He whipped up some raised beds. (He is becoming quite the carpenter actually! More on that later!) We filled them with some gardening soil... and there ya have it! I think we watered the garden maybe 10 times. It seems relatively effortless. And we have some cucumbers, tomatoes, and watermelon!

The boys absolutely love it as well! There isn't a better way to get kids to eat their veggies than to have them grow them themselves. It is also a great way to talk to the boys about how God grows us and weeds us and waters us- so that we can bear fruit for His glory.

I think next year we are going bigger!

PS- Get a look at those "art" hands! Those things are looking rugged.

Today he is four.

2010-03-24T07:12:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, you were my little bughead bughead.
Today, you are a big boy. My Oliver.
Yesterday, you loved sweet potatoes and bananas.
Today, you love Olive Garden.
Yesterday, I would rock to sleep for your naps in the blue rocker.
Today, you scream when I even mention the words nappy naps.
Yesterday, I would take you for walks in the stroller or snugli.
Today, you strap on your Thomas helmet and take off on your bike.
Yesterday, I would change your stinky poops.
Today, you go potty in the big boy potty all by yourself.
Yesterday, I would watch you scribble drawings for me.
Today, you can write your own name (and others!) from memory!
Yesterday, I couldn't imagine a day without you by my side.
Today, I can't imagine a day without you by my side, but you will be going to school in only a few months.

You are growing so fast. You are amazingly brilliant! (completely unbiased.) You make me laugh and I cry sometimes just because I love you so much. Thank you for being my son. Thank you for being my Oliver.

I love you.

3 months

2010-03-11T10:07:00.000-08:00

wow!

2010-03-04T14:26:00.001-08:00

Cast your vote

2010-02-25T12:40:00.000-08:00

Please vote in the comments section.
Tell me which photograph of my sweet Ramona from Oklahoma, that you like the best.

Ramona was a rescued dog. My sister and I were driving down highway 41, when we noticed a sign for free puppies. Windy was newly pregnant. We pulled my sister's mauve colored Alero into the muddy driveway and figured it was worth the risk. If her soon-to-be husband left her, she would be a good single mother anyway. I had already brought home 3 cats at this point, so I figured I could pull off a dog. (I didn't have any children yet.) Besides, there wasn't any harm in just looking. We had no idea what lay in store for us when we walked into that trailer.

The house was a pit. Gross. Smelly. And over ran with kittens. I was looking around past the multiple ashtrays and empty beer cans, trying to spot the puppies. While trying to hold our breath, we followed the man with the mullet out the back door. Oh. My. In the backyard were multiple pens. I stood there amazed as sheep, goats, rats, bunnies, an enormous pig, dogs, and 2 puppies looked back at me. Desperate.

The puppies were both females. They were in a pen about the size of a large coffee table with 3 other full grown dogs. Being trampled. The man handed Ramona to me and Lexi to my sister. The dogs were limp. The stomachs were literally crawling with all the worms inside. They looked so sad, yet so hopeful.

That was that. We certainly weren't going to leave those puppies there. Couldn't do it. I remember sitting in the car and thinking that these dogs might not make it to the vet. They were that bad.

The vet didn't seem too optimistic. But both dogs pulled through. And here she is now, nearly 6 years later. She follows me everywhere. She listens so well. She will occasionally chew up the forgotten Pez dispenser if we aren't careful. But I love her. She protects us. She plays with us. She loves my boys.

My Ramona from Oklahoma.
(This is where we got her name.)

POW! Whack! Swoosh!

2010-02-24T11:25:00.000-08:00

Superhero
Main Entry: su·per·hero
Pronunciation: (so̵̅o̅′pər hir′ō)
Function: noun
Date: 1917
: a fictional hero having extraordinary or superhuman powers; also : an exceptionally skillful or successful person

To watch you two running, out of control, crashing into walls and furniture.
Waiting to kiss the ouchies.
Listening to the plots of "saving the day" in your secret clubhouse. (a giant cardboard box)
Knowing that all too soon, I will be missing these days.

Thank you Lord for this.

Thank you Oliver and Liam, for being the most amazing little boys that a momma could ever ask for.

deep breath.

2010-02-23T13:10:00.000-08:00

Nothing quite like a little ispiration to keep the day moving along.
My little blog has been neglected, oh so badly.

2 months already!

2010-01-29T14:08:00.000-08:00

Facebook | Rudy -Brooke Guerrero: Choice?

2010-01-26T08:55:00.000-08:00

Facebook Rudy -Brooke Guerrero: Choice?:

"Your 'right' to choose
took away mine
Your wrong choice
cost me my life.

I chose to live
You forced me to die
I chose to speak
You silenced my cry
I chose to see you
You gouged out my eyes
I chose to touch you
You cut off my hands
I chose freedom
You sentenced me to suction
I chose love
You threw me away.

There is an army in heaven
Fifty million strong
We are witnesses against you
your 'right' to choose is Wrong.

By: Brooke 12/3/09"

5 weeks

2010-01-05T12:21:00.000-08:00

I have to say that things are getting easier around here. Naps are more routine. The boys are hit and miss with their moods though. It seems that Oliver is getting angry more easily. And Liam is just missing having his momma to himself. So, they are a little needy now and then. But that was to be expected. Eliza is doing wonderfully. She was 10lbs 10 oz and 23 in at her one month appointment. Growing so fast! She has been smiling since the day she was born (no joke) and cooing at me for a week or so now. It makes me want to just squeeze-squeeze-squeeze her!

As for me, I have been wanting to start getting back into shape. And my best friend, Bri, gave me an awesome Christmas present! A treadmill!!! It totally rocks. Now, I just have to be disciplined in using it. And not scarfing down 5 chocolate chip cookies at a time... I know that the sooner I am more comfortable in my own skin, the sooner I will be a happier person when getting dressed for church. No tears: that is my goal.

Justin went back to work this week. He has been home so much. He took 2 weeks off when Eliza was born. Then he had the holidays off. And I really got used to having him around. He really is amazing and just makes me smile. Even when we argue about how long one should hold down the broken toilet handle when flushing... (I don't hold it long enough, apparently.) I suppose it isn't so bad when that is all we have to argue about... and then we laugh. I miss him right now actually. Hey bearnaby, if you are reading this... I am missing you terribly on Tuesday afternoon at 3:33 p.m.

Not really sure where to go from here in this post. It is kind of all over the place. I will leave you with this...

Flash Mob Link

It makes me unbelievably happy... and motivated. Just watch it.

one month of...

2009-12-30T11:01:00.000-08:00

...singing lullabies

...staying inside

...soaking it in
...sleepless nights

...smiles and coos

...dirty diapers

...loving the smell of breastfed babies dirty diapers

...changing outfits just because it is cute

...laundry

...smelling her hair

...getting used to bath time (it's a work in progress)

...watching the boys love their little sister so very much

...mylicon drops

...kissing fingers and toes

...strapping on the sling to do dishes or run the vacuum

...lansinoh cream (ahhh)

...trying to make time slow down

...enjoying the blessings that God has bestowed upon our family

Happy 1 Month Birthday Eliza!

4 days...

2009-12-05T15:07:00.000-08:00

She is here...

2009-12-04T09:55:00.000-08:00

...and we are in love.

Eliza Jane Wilderman

November 30, 2009

11:57 am

8 lbs 6 oz & 21 in

Happy Thanksgiving!

2009-11-26T06:25:00.001-08:00

Just for fun...

2009-11-23T11:52:00.000-08:00

This is by far, one of the best photos I have ever captured. It is my niece, Addisyn. My-oh-my the faces that this little girl makes... Makes me crack up every single time. Hope it brought a smile to you today, too.

Catching up...

2009-11-17T13:25:00.000-08:00

By the way, Happy belated Halloween!

from a dinosaur-Oliver and a cow-Liam

2009-11-16T13:08:00.000-08:00

Welcome to our bedroom!

And because I am neurotic when I am with child... I just had to redecorate our bedroom (and living room and bathroom) as well. My (totallyawesomeandlovingcaringnurturing) mom bought us the duvet cover, curtains, curtain rods, and bed skirt. (After sewing the crib skirt, I so owe her big time... I can't imagine making a bed skirt. ug) The prints are from Elsita Mora. Her work makes me sigh. I just love her blog banner for that matter! And the dresser is off of Craigslist for $20.00. Some paint and new knobs (hard labor courtesy of my husband) and it is as good as new! The walls are solid wood panels. Serious business here folks... wooden walls + wooden floors = sleeping in a solid pine box. Not good for the "zen" of the room... whatever that is. We decided we wanted gray. Yummy-sweet-soothe-my-soul gray. Justin did all of the painting also. Have I mentioned lately just how much I adore that man?! Anyway, the room is perfect!

2009-11-15T12:20:00.000-08:00

Welcome to Eliza's Nursery... we have been busy these past few months.

I made her a corkboard to dispay her photos. And I used passed down broaches as the push pins.

I repainted my old dresser from my childhood and made her a nifty-quick quilt.

I made her a hat and cozy snuggler for her infant photo sessions!

I hung up this print and showcased some of my favorite fabric.

I made her a banner with some lovely Amy Butler paper.

Daddy made her a shelf out of old barn wood from Gram and Pawpaw's house. Momma made her a dress, a wall-pocket, some bunnies, and a name plaque. The flowers in the vase are from my wedding.

I made her mirror like new with some paint.

I made her a soft block, a new boppy, and a nursing cover for me.

I made her a quilt that is a sea-full-a-circles.

I made her a crib skirt that I think is the perfect touch.

I made her a pillow to rest her little noggin'.

I made her some giant tissue paper puffs to adore as she drifts off to sleep.

Daddy painted her nursery and Momma made the curtains with care.

And now we wait for her arrival...

(P.S. I don't think we actually bought anything other than fabric and knobs for the shelf.)

Meet the Millers...

2009-10-07T13:26:00.000-07:00

Wayne, Jessica, Kenzy, & Reed

It was a drizzly day... But I think we had fun!

Thanks for putting up with all of my barking like a dog. :)

I do what I have to do...

Ethan the adorable...

2009-10-04T20:28:00.000-07:00

What a sweet family! Thanks so much for allowing me to hang out with you for a while...

progress...

2009-09-24T07:45:00.000-07:00

Thanks for a fun shoot!

whew...

2009-09-17T11:08:00.000-07:00

Man, I have been busy. And I have gotten behind on blogging! So, I am just gonna skip ahead to the photos I am working on now. (Many apologies to those that have not made the blog debut.) What can I say?! I will just blame it on pregnancy. :) Nobody argues with that one!

Shelby Rose

2009-09-07T21:36:00.000-07:00

She walks into the laundromat, with her overloaded basket of dirty clothes, wearing Riders high-waisted jeans that are 2 sizes too small. The breeze from the door catches her feathered bangs and permed blonde hair with dusty brown roots. She removes her pack of Virginia Slims from her left back pocket and searches for her lighter in the other. She goes about her routine in this arena. It is clear that this is a place that she knows all too well. She sorts her children's clothes and places the quarters into the slots. She walks outside and sits on the sidewalk, lighting up a cigarette. She is not a perfect woman. Hard-working, honest, and humble. She works too hard for what little she has. The most untainted love for her children pushes her to take chances that she probably shouldn't.

Her name is Shelby Rose. And if she were a person, that is who I imagine she would be.

She is my cat. And this is her story.

Shelby was a stray cat that had 2 kittens. She lived behind our apartment on 7th Street in Terre Haute. When we first found her, she was feral and wouldn't come near us. We diligently put out food for her and her babies. We waited and talked to her for weeks. And eventually, she let us pet her. We named her "Stray" and made a make-shift shelter for her when winter came. It wasn't until she started walking with a limp that we brought her in. We took her to the vet and had some tests ran. She was then our Shelby cat. We found a home for one of her kittens. Unfortunately, the other kitten didn't make it. We brought her in with our 2 other cats, Pepper and Lillian. And they became friends after a week or two of ironing out the hierarchy. She was a mother to them and one of the most playful of all of our pets. She would run around and bat those annoying balls all over that apartment.

We have had Shelby for around 7-8 years. And I didn't know that losing a pet would hurt so much. As I type this, she is laying a few feet from me, slowly passing away. Shelby has a very aggressive form of mammary gland cancer. The tumors grew quickly and spread all over her little body... too many to count. I am grateful for the chance to say goodbye to her. But it is so hard to imagine this house without her flinging the ant pieces from the boys' ants in the pants game around on the dining room floor. Or without picking up her "chuck" when she eats too much. Or without her laying at the base of the recliner when I rock the boys to sleep as she rubs her head on my feet. Walking in and finding her asleep on a freshly folded pile of clothes on my bed and not moving her, because she looks so sweet. Seeing her in the window when I pull into the drive. Watching her and Ramona (my dog) lay in the sun together. They were best friends.

I learned some life lessons from Shebby-sher...

Love people, just because.

What good would it be to have a world full of people that fit my idea of what perfect is? You see, Shelby had colitis (inflammation of the colon) and it caused her to urinate in places that are soft and comfortable, like my clean or dirty laundry. This would aggravate me to no end. And I would get so angry with her. But it wasn't her fault. She was doing what she had to do. And regardless if I thought it was the right thing or not, it was what she had to do for her. It made things smelly and made extra work for me... but it wasn't something that she could do any differently. I have a hard time accepting people for who they are. More so, I have a really hard time accepting the decisions that people make, when I think that they should do it differently. And this causes strain on those relationships. Shelby has taught me that I am not the one to decide what is right for other people. I just have to be there and love them, even when it is smelly.

Evynn!

2009-08-20T09:48:00.000-07:00

(And I absolutely must give a "high five" to Evynn's mom, Shey... she made Evynn's tutu and headband! I love crafty moms... they rock.)

Heidi's 1 Year Photos!

2009-08-14T06:50:00.000-07:00

Luke's Senior Photos

2009-08-12T14:19:00.000-07:00

Brittani's Senior Photos

2009-08-12T06:49:00.000-07:00

for bella.

2009-07-29T13:29:00.000-07:00

...in exchange for a million and one nice things.

Perhaps, I should have made more dresses.

It doesn't seem like an even exchange.

for Eliza...

2009-07-27T16:59:00.000-07:00

The sewing bug has finally bitten me.

I've been feeling a tad overwhelmed with my ever-growing to-do list for Eliza and her room.

And today, I made something that wasn't even on the list. Go figure.

This lovely little dress is slightly copied from one that I got on clearance at Target.

And the headband is easy peasy.

I didn't use a pattern, so I can't direct you to anything if you like it.

I like it.

I like it, a lot.

(Name that movie...)

In 4 months...

2009-07-24T07:08:00.000-07:00

Joining the royal Wilderman family of...

Sir Justin Edward,

Madame Sunny Lee,

Oliver the Great,

and

King Liam Edward,

will be...

(22 weeks along in photos)

Lady Eliza Jane.

That's right folks, we have a name!

Eliza Jane Wilderman

rest...

2009-07-22T11:29:00.000-07:00

...and hopefully I will tend to my sewing.

par-tay

2009-07-20T06:25:00.000-07:00

King Liam Edward Turns Two!

2009-07-18T08:27:00.000-07:00

My sweet baby "miam" is 2 years old today.

Miam's top ten...
1. "wanna tickoo beldee" : He wants to tickle my belly button. He has always found comfort in rubbing my belly button and his belly button when he is sleepy or sick.
2. The way he sucks his bottom lip.
3. He can make me laugh when I am on the verge of tears with his dimples.
4. He makes me feel like my heart could seriously shatter into a million pieces. When he wants "bid huds and tisses" and wraps his little arms around my neck so tight.
5. He makes me love Justin more everyday. The way I see Justin in Liam's personality... he is so loving, tender, and easily irritated.
6. Liam has helped me grow closer to God. The way that the Lord has given Liam to me to help me grow and know HIM better through being a better parent.
7. When he runs, he has these little knobby legs and he is "knock-kneed". He definitely has his own swagger.
8. His inability to refrain from shamming anything and everything into his hair... sand, mud, rocks, macaroni and cheese, lotion, you name it...
9. He loves to sing and dance. And he is a riot. I am especially fond of when he sings his Yo Gabba Gabba songs. And when he does his beat box impersonation.
10. Watching him sleep. He refuses to keep blankets on. And he has to have his airplane pillow from Pottery Barn Kids (that I got for $3 at a yard sale, best $3 I've spent in a while.) He wraps his little arms around that pillow and shoves his little butt up in the air. It is priceless.

FB

2009-07-01T15:55:00.000-07:00

red9studios has a facebook page!

red9studios facebook page

So if you are a fellow facebook user, become a fan!

or not, it is up to you...

Mr. Hayden

2009-06-30T10:03:00.000-07:00

getting caught up...

2009-06-24T15:24:00.000-07:00

This little fella is Carson Hulet.

He is only 1 month old.

He loves his pacifier.

He belongs to one of my life long friends, Chrystal and her fiance Sean.

Congratulations guys!

sneak peak

2009-06-16T14:08:00.000-07:00

I have to say that miss Ellie was the BEST model I have ever had! What a little lady! And her brother Ray... what a cutie. Don't cha just want to pinch his little cheeks?!

ceremony...

2009-06-15T08:05:00.000-07:00

dum dum da-dum...

2009-06-10T13:09:00.000-07:00

I have a bridal shower to go to.

Here is what I came up with.
*embroidered kitchen hand towel
*quilted pot-holder
*hand stamped recipe cards
*fabric envelope for recipe cards

I think I will bundle it all up in a cozy little basket...

It is all handmade. Just how I like it... And a shout out to Tasha for lending me the stamp set. You rock!

as promised.

2009-06-10T12:50:00.000-07:00

more to come...

2009-06-05T06:42:00.000-07:00

sweet peony

2009-05-27T07:18:00.000-07:00

We will be 14 weeks pregnant tomorrow. I think I am going to find out the gender if the information is available to us in 6 weeks or so.

If we are having a little girl (Justin thinks so, me... well I am not so sure.) Anyway, if we are having a little girl, I want to blow up these photos that I took yesterday and put them in her room. We still don't have a name for a boy or a girl... We are thinking Silas for a boy. But we are stuck on a girl's name. I am being kind of picky.

I want a name that is...
light
airy
pure
classic
reminds me of white eyelet lace
simple
feminine

And these photos make me think of those things. So, it seemed obvious that if we do have a girl, that these should nest in her room.

If you have a suggestion, leave it in the comment box. We are also fond of Irish names... Oliver and Liam are our boys names. :)

These are the days...

2009-05-26T06:37:00.000-07:00

My boys. (sigh)
Seriously, I am so blessed.
Thank you Lord.

This reminds me of my brother!

2009-05-21T07:37:00.000-07:00

Just watch this link...

body popper

sunshine + frilly skirts = a good time!

2009-05-12T07:02:00.000-07:00

Kenzie and Addy Kate!

Oh and these too...

2009-05-07T07:51:00.000-07:00

If you want to schedule a photo shoot for you, a friend, or your family...
email me at: sunnywilderman@sbcglobal.net

All my pricing information is available here.

busy... busy...

2009-05-06T10:56:00.000-07:00

It's time for Senior Photos!
Meet Levi...
He is the lead singer in a band!
He is open-minded!
He has awesome hair!
He was a blast to hang out with!

Thanks Levi!

Trust and Obey for there's no better way...

2009-04-28T14:25:00.000-07:00

To be happy in Jesus, but to trust and obey.

We used to sing that song a lot at my former church. And I love it. I love the feelings that the song resurrects in me. As a relatively new Christian... the zealous passion... the inability to fight the tears during worship... ahhhh. Sweet memories.

I wrote a post on Tuesday and wasn't sure if I should post it. Wasn't sure I was ready to make the words real. Perhaps for fear that I might have to make good on them... But the truth is, publishing the post doesn't make it real. The thoughts, feelings, and intentions are there long before the words are even typed out.

The ultrasound went great. The baby is healthy and growing. All the problems have apparently healed so well, that the ultrasound technician couldn't even find evidence of where it had been. God is the greatest physician. And Healer.

And now that the ultrasound is over... I realized that I still have to trust God the same as I did when the outcome was so uncertain. Because, all outcomes are still uncertain. Not only for my unborn child, but also for my 2 strapping sons, my husband, myself, my family...

It is really about not taking one moment for granted. And still begging God to have mercy on us and please help prepare us for His will. Whatever that may be.

Because, while I wanted to pray for the Lord to heal the broken parts of my body, and continue to knit together my unborn child in my womb... I knew I couldn't. I prayed for the Lord to prepare me. And heal the broken parts of my spirit. So, that I would be able to bring glory to His name, no matter what His will would be. There were lots of inner struggles. And total chaos. Flat out, I was sad. Then mad. Then blame shifting. Then mad again. Then numb. Then aggravated... You get the idea.

This is the first post:

I guess I don't really know how to start this post...

Over the past year or so, I have cried, prayed, and hoped with some pretty amazing women.

Destiny, Angie, MckMama, and many others have given me a new insight into the blessing that parenthood truly is. To empathize with a friend over the loss of her child. To mourn the loss of a stranger's child. To hope and pray for the heart of a stranger's unborn son. To mourn the struggle with infertility through someone else's shoes. To not have to experience all of the pain first hand...

Tomorrow, I go for an ultrasound, that will give us some information as to the well-being of our 10 week old child in my tummy. It was a real struggle at first. To deal with the uncertainty. To surrender all feelings of control. To just stop thinking and worrying about it long enough to just fall asleep. It was hard to get to the point of just saying, "It's up to you God, and no matter what Your will is... You still ROCK." It was even harder to actually mean it. And I know that the Holy Spirit is the one that stepped in and showed me how to calm down. I can say, that today I feel at ease. I know that God is still the same. Up there holding the deck. And no matter how the cards fall for this family, He knows what is best for us.

I think that God has used these women to prepare me for this. To show me how to love Him when life is hard. To experience joy in troubled times. To know the happiness that is being carried by the Lord. To know the liberation that comes with surrendering to the Lord, and not worrying. Being careful for nothing.

Through this all (a whole week, whoop dee do... could be worse) I want to be sure that I am learning what it is that the Lord is trying to teach me. I know there is a reason for this to be happening. I know that there are no coincidences in life. I want God and I to be tight enough that I don't miss it. I certainly wouldn't want all of this to be in vain, because I missed the point.

I don't even think I will publish this post. I don't want to publish it, especially if this isn't bringing glory to God.

I think I learned, first hand, that there is joy in sorrow. There is much to rejoice about. When you are hurt, turn to God to carry you. Let Him call the shots. And love Him the same no matter what. There is joy there. A real joy. An honest happiness. Nothing shallow like the alternatives that the world has to offer.

And God has blessed me beyond reason already. Salvation... hello?! I don't have to experience the judgement that I deserve. My amazing husband. Wow, he is awesome. And continues to knock my socks off everyday. It is so easy to submit to a man that I respect so much. My 2 sons. They are a source of comfort that isn't like anything. They can make me laugh when all I want to do is cry. And my family and friends are fabulous. Bringing me magazines, flowers, cookies, and checking on me... God has not only provided me with a heavenly Father for support, but has blessed me with a support network of people that really astound me.

I know that my Lord loves me. And I know that He only wants to bring me joy. And I now know that joy isn't joy with out the pain of sorrow and trouble.

So, I guess the reason why I wanted to go ahead and post this is... just in case someone out there is struggling. Try to know the liberty that comes in trusting the Lord.

P.S.
I did a google search for photos of the development stage of a 10 week old fetus... and this is what my little bean looks like...

I was born on Mother's Day...

2009-04-20T06:31:00.000-07:00

Coincidence, I think not.

I can't really put into words the joy that being a mother brings to me. My awesome friend Bri tells me that we both have a "mother's heart". And it made me realize that not all mother's feel the way that we do...

A mother's heart...

made me lay on the floor next to Oliver's bed last night, while tears streamed down my face, and softly rub his hair as I listened to him sleep. I would rest my head on his legs and let the tears fall onto his blankets, while praying for his safety, wisdom, and future.

A mother's heart...

was beating so strongly last night as I rocked Liam to sleep on my chest in the recliner. I imagined my love for him just seeping through my chest, my shirt, and right into his little body.

A mother's heart...

is what allows me to love my little baby so much, as I sing lullabies to my child inside. It was a grateful mother's heart that brought tears to my eyes as I heard my child's heartbeat, so strong. So lovely.

A few weeks ago, I was at a baby shower for a friend of mine from high school. There were a couple of girls there that I graduated with. One of them is pregnant. She asked what I was doing these days. I replied that I got to spend my days at home with my boys. And she asked if I go crazy... and stated that she doesn't know how I do it. And the truth is, that I wouldn't want it any other way. I don't want to miss the successful trips to the potty. The fights over toys. The tickle fights. The lunchtime talks. The nap time fits and tantrums. I love the good and the inconvenient. There were times when Justin and I only had one car, that I thought I was going to go cuckoo without a way to get out and do things... and I realize that yes, it is nice to have the option to run and get baby wipes if I run out... but ultimately, I am happy here. Not content. Not okay. Not it'll do. I am happy at home. And I wouldn't want to be anywhere else. And I wouldn't want my boys anywhere else.

(DISCLAIMER: All of this to say, that it is a mother's love that also makes the difficult decision to go to work and to have daycare for her children. Sometimes, love has to do what is hard... and it is a wise woman that can recognize that she would not do her children any favors by staying home, when she is miserable there...)

Growing up, I never said that I wanted to "just be a mommy". I wanted to be a movie star actually. I am grateful to have a God that knows what I am really best at. And for his patience as I fought tooth and nail the idea of being a stay at home mother and wife.

I have never known happiness like I do now. As a wife. As a mother.

And I am so very grateful...

so tiny...

2009-04-14T11:38:00.000-07:00

This is Hayden Allen. Remember these photos of Brandy? Tada!

(and just think... I am going to have a tiny one in 7 1/2 months! ahhh... sigh... warm fuzzy...)

the dashing dapper duo!

2009-04-13T05:55:00.000-07:00

hip. hip. hop. and ya don't stop.

2009-04-11T12:54:00.000-07:00

Some Easter bunnies for my boys' baskets. These were really easy to make. I used the free pattern by Wee Wonderfuls . I was quite pleased with the outcome. I could even see adding a bell on the inside and making these as baby rattles as well.

I do hope that everyone remembers that Christ rose from the grave and that is why we celebrate Easter. It isn't about bunnies, jelly beans, or new clothes... I am trying to get Oliver to understand the meaning of Easter and I think he is catching on. That being said, he loves jelly beans.

So...go on! There is still time to make your own bunny!
Happy Easter.

P.S. There are loads of great Easter craft ideas at the Craft Crow.

guess what?

2009-04-01T06:00:00.000-07:00

We are having a baby!

(Edit: I just realized that I should've waited to post this until tomorrow. :) It is for real! Due date is December 3!)

Grandma.

2009-03-29T15:31:00.000-07:00

Grandma used to give me gum all the time.

Grandma used to take me to garage sales and let me get whatever I wanted.

Grandma used to wear her zip up blue robe in the mornings.

Grandma used to laugh all the time.

Grandma used to drink fountain Cokes all day.

Grandma has stage 4 Lymphoma.

Grandma has to struggle to breathe.

Grandma is only 62.

Grandma is my only grandma and I love her.

Please be praying for her... and my family.

this is awesome.

2009-03-26T16:18:00.000-07:00

Oliver's 3rd Birthday

2009-03-25T15:37:00.000-07:00

Bughead is getting so big.

2 old curtains...

2009-03-19T07:04:00.000-07:00

...reborn as treat bags for Oliver's 3rd Birthday Party!

I looked around for how to make the drawstring backpacks. Mama Urchin has a tutorial here. I liked this but I didn't find any gromets at Wal-Mart. So, I improvised and just sewed the ribbons into the bottom.

Fun!

2005 VW Passat!

2009-03-11T17:18:00.000-07:00

I am so pumped! This past weekend, I got a car!

Justin and I had been doing good with one vehicle. I stayed home and he took it to work. If I needed to do something, I would take him to work and pick him up. It wasn't impossible, just kind of a bummer.

I am so grateful that we have been blessed with a new to us vehicle. We have paid off over $20,000 in debt over the past 18 months. While I wasn't too amped about another loan, I was glad that we had saved up a large sum of money for a down payment.

So, here are the exact photos of my (Justin calls it mine) car from the Tom Wood website. If you are in the market for a new vehicle, let me know and I will put you in touch with a genuine salesman. He was really great to us. And funny.

Now I can visit people instead of making them always come to see me. :)

(Did you see that sunroof?!)

this kid...

2009-03-10T05:50:00.000-07:00

...makes me happy.

my oliver.

2009-03-03T13:55:00.000-08:00

This is the song that I have sang to Oliver since he was a little baby. I used to rock him to sleep everynight and sing this to him... I remember being huge pregnant with Oliver draped over my belly, drifting to sleep, as I sang to him and Liam (in my belly). I remember one night, I was goofing around with Oliver and he would start laughing. Then Liam would start kicking me. Then I would start laughing. Then Oliver would laugh. Then Liam would kick. Then I would laugh... you get the picture. That is one of my most cherished memories.

To hear Oliver sing this... well, it brought tears to my eyes.

o and l

2009-02-27T12:06:00.000-08:00

Have I mentioned lately...

that I will turn the car around to go get your "choo-choo"...

how when I get you out of the tub, and hug me so tight, I feel like my heart could explode...

that when you sing the Noggin' songs, I listen so close and smile like the world depends on it.

how when I hear you say "Momma", it opens a part of me that I never knew existed.

that I can't remember life before you...

Have I mentioned lately, that I love my boys, more than they will ever know. More than I ever knew I could. And I always will...

(Edit: Shout Out! to Aunt Sissy for our stellar shirts... You rock.)

5:16 a.m.

2009-02-23T10:42:00.000-08:00

twisting. unreeling. searching.
for you through the sea of our sheets.

my hands travel the void on our full size.
to hang senselessly onto your silhouette.

to this, we drift.
as I safely cling to the sun on your back.

the most tender. most sincere.
moments are conducted here.

between dreams and morning day.
listening. so quietly. listening.

to the breath that vacations so shortly.
to be there.

i will unzip your chest.
and crawl inside.

She's a natural.

2009-02-19T07:53:00.000-08:00

My niece... Addy Kate.

Other news.

Hmmm.

Well, I don't have any.

go figure... oh yeah, well there is that?!#%&@

[in a whisper.] (psst. wanna know a secret? a really embarrassing secret about me... i was waiting on justin to leave for work late last night. we always wave goodbye and blow kisses at the window. we have for years. and well my gut started rumbling and twisting. i clenched the cheeks. you know what i am talkin about... and as i raced to the restroom, i "sharted" in my undies. classy, i know. it was just a little bit. but hey, i am human. and i reserve the right to "go poops" in my pants every once and a while. by the way, i find it liberating to expose my reality to a world of people that don't get to see me blush... wait a minute, i don't blush.)

Please excuse the one bad word in the clip. Sorry, I don't cuss in real life. :)

ushy gushy mushy...

2009-02-13T09:37:00.000-08:00

made from Molly Chicken's tutorial

Happy Valentine's Day!

baby on board.

2009-02-11T01:00:00.000-08:00

1. 2. 3...

2009-02-10T09:06:00.000-08:00

Paint with me!

Today, we painted the door window. I had initially wanted to decorate it for Valentine's Day. But, that got thrown out really quick. I just decided to let the boys have fun. And let their imaginations run wild... Needless to say, they had a ball.

Not Me Monday...

2009-02-09T15:54:00.000-08:00

Today, I did not give Oliver and Liam a spoonful of cherry icing... twice. That is unhealthy and I would never do that.

I also did not eat 2 spoonfuls of cherry icing. Never.

I did take the boys for a walk in the stroller. But I did not think of ways to blow up that stinkin hunk of junk stroller... as I was sweating in 50 degree weather as I struggled to steer the immobile wreck on wheels. I have way more patience than that.

I did not get onto Facebook like 10 times today. I do have a life, don't I?!

I did not fart in the bathtub last night and smell it. What am I, five years old?!

I did not act immature and get upset with Justin for having to work late tonight. I am a loving, kind, understanding wife... not an irrational, lunatic, on a mission to make her husband miserable.

I did not order out for dinner because I didn't want to cook. Again.

I would never do any of those things. And if any of you know me at all, you know that I am full of it...

these days...

2009-02-06T08:19:00.000-08:00

rolling around in Momma's bed, hiding under the white sheets, glowing with the morning sun...

little feet peeking out to say hello...

turning the corner to see a face full of shaving cream, and feeling a smile that could save the planet stretch across my face...

when these moments happen, I try to tell my brain, quite literally, remember everything about this... the time of day, the way it smells now, the way I feel, the way they look... (and now, I have tears streaming down my face)

why do they grow up so quickly?

to play...

2009-02-04T11:12:00.000-08:00

Joy is not in things, but in us.

These are the moments.

Simple pleasures are priceless treasures.

It’s a happy talent to know how to play.

–Emerson

i lubs him. (fixed the video!)

2009-02-03T07:58:00.000-08:00

forever and ever.

snuggie 101

2009-02-02T08:28:00.000-08:00

(Photo taken with a webcam, not the greatest quality, I know.)

My mom bought me a Snuggie! I am pumped. However, I think that the snuggie may bring mankind to it's ultimate demise... laziness. It is impossible to get motivated when I am so warm and snugglie.

There are only 2 pitfalls to the Snuggie.
1. Catches pet hair like crazy.
2. I about electrocuted myself with the static electricity that this thing puts off. Seriously, I saw the spark from the phone to my face the other day, and IT HURT!

Other than that, 50 gold stars!

For my Mom...

2009-01-30T12:37:00.000-08:00

And everyone else that is stuck in the daily grind.

wow.

2009-01-29T10:13:00.000-08:00

for Jesse and Destiny...

2009-01-28T10:13:00.000-08:00

Love You Both!

For more about Destiny and Jesse's story click here.

for sissy...

2009-01-27T06:47:00.000-08:00

Nothin' quite like a lil Ole Nick Donalt. :)

Inauguration 2009

2009-01-20T11:27:00.000-08:00

(shuffle shuffle shuffle... steps onto soapbox... clears throat...)

You know... if you can't say something nice... well...

He is our president. Get used to it. Either help out or get out. Be a part of the solution not a part of the problem.

(steps off of soapbox...)

waddya get when ya drink too much coffee?

2009-01-15T13:17:00.000-08:00

new pillows.

Oh, sorry. Have ya already heard that one?!

Needing some advice...

2009-01-12T12:13:00.000-08:00

On 2 things, please...

1. Potty training Oliver.
He will go pee-pee in the potty when he wants to. If he wants a prize or if I remind him, he will at least try... sometimes. He will not go poop in the potty. Ever. Not even a little. He isn't hiding when he poops. I can't even really figure out when he is pooping to take him to the potty. Advice?

2. He lies about pooping in his pants.
I will ask him if he has pooped. He says no or blames it on Liam. I remind him that if he lies to me that he will get a spankin. He still holds to the "no poop" story. He will also lie if I ask him if he got out of his bed (when he has a toy, so obviously he has gotten up...)and then he gets in trouble for telling lies. I am thinking he is saying "no" because he knows that we want him to poop in the potty. I have tried to explain to him that he won't get in trouble for pooping in his pants. He gets in trouble for telling lies about pooping in his pants. Am I even making any sense?! UG.

Has anyone got any advice? Been there? Made it out alive and with all your hair in place?

He will be 3 in March and I do think he understands the process of going potty. If I ask him where he is supposed to poop he will tell me in the big boy potty. I am talking in circles... help?