Monday, October 8, 2007

Raw and Real

Okay...I have been thinking about divorce.
(Not for myself...if he wants out, he will have to kill me...)

What constitutes getting a divorce? If a woman does not keep her house to the standard that her husband holds for her, does he have the right? If a man does not earn the income that a woman insists is necessary for her satisfaction with life, does that give her the right? If a man is not satisfied intimately by his partner, does that give him the right? If a woman is not satisfied with the level of communication between her and her partner, does that give her the right?

It is easy to blame shift. "I would not have been looking if they would have satisfied my needs in the first place." "I was pushed to misery and frustration and had to find a release, so I did this..." Does someone else doing wrong, make it okay for the partner to do wrong?

Perhaps we should try to COMMUNICATE. If you are unhappy with something. Talk about it, openly and honestly. Don't sugarcoat things. Be raw and real.

I know a couple that are possibly facing that situation. Divorce is huge. It played a larger role in my childhood than I give it credit for. It scars people and does things and causes pain that can't be undone. It should not be a decision made on a whim. It should not happen. But if it does, make sure that you have exhausted every single avenue of possible solutions first. The grass always looks greener on the other side. But that grass might have issues that are unseen to the naked eye.

My point here...THINK about it first. TRY everything under the sun to fix the marriage. REMEMBER why you married the person in the first place. FOCUS on the positive attributes of that person, not the negative. You made a VOW to GOD and you shouldn't take that lightly. And if there are kids...don't be selfish. LOVE does what is best for THE ONE LOVED. Wake up and open your eyes. What you are doing is REAL.

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